Monday, June 20, 2005

Scalia for Pope

Just in case nobody had ever said it before, I want to be on record.

Typing the words Scalia for Chief Justice into google produces lots of results. 227,000, to be precise. Of course, that wasn't a phrase in quotes. Still, it brought back both news results and other webpages.

Typing in the quoted phrase "Scalia for pope" produced 0 ghits. Language Log may have helped popularize "ghits" for google hits; Mark Liberman ascribes the coinage to Trevor, who blogs at Oreneta.com using a blog name that defies easy categorization by me, see for yourself, but I don't know what to think. I just use the coinage. (followup: I think Mark is wrong, since a brief review of search results at the oreneta blog produces further attribution to other persons. Whatever)

My rationale is Scalia's own stated (joking) preference, reported in the WashPo by Charles Lane in an article on the Chief Justice's most recent clerk reunion. For what it's worth, I too would prefer that he be the Pope than be Chief Justice. Then his evident dislike for homosexuals, fornicators, and illict drug-users could be put into policy directly, rather than smuggled in through originalist readings, plain text readings, arguments from stare decisis and history (they hated gays in the 1770s! Oh, wait, they didn't, since homosexuality didn't exist in its current form, culturally speaking), and naked power grabs that contravene federalism, the structure of our republic, and the Constitution.

Unfortunately, his dislike for filthy hippies and flag-burners would necessarily go to the back burner. Not only can you not rule against them as Pope (he was forced by his conscience to rule in favor of flag burners, he says. But not those medical marijuana users!), you might even have to forgive them, bless them, and love them as fellow creations of God. Rather than, say, let them be put to death.

Sorry, I'm a bit disgruntled.

Also, hello to Language Log readers who might have followed the link from this LL post.

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